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The Pink Monster

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I’m going to be honest here. The only reason I got The Remote Body Wave Vibrator was because it has a remote. I mean, come on! A remote?  A remote with 7 different kinds of vibrating options? That’s all kinds of awesome.

Yea. All kinds of awesome if you have someone to USE the remote for you. Which I do not.

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First off, this thing is a pink monster. I mean, it’s freaking THICK. When I opened the package, I was intimidated. I looked at it and immediately thought that it wouldn’t be very comfortable.Turns out it wasn’t uncomfortable, just a bit awkward.

I had to relax. A lot. I mean, I’m no stranger to thickness (props to R) so really, this shouldn’t have been so bad. But I really had to relax and use the round end to get excited enough to where inserting this bad boy didn’t feel awkward. This is about where the remote became totally obsolete. First of all, this thing is big so I had to keep a grip on it that allowed me to also attempt to use the little buttons ON the vibrator. Which, if you know anything about me and my coordination, this wasn’t exactly easy. I thought I would use my free hand to work the remote but I was always putting it down to re-adjust the actual vibrator. So I ended up giving up on the remote and using one hand to keep the vibrator steady, and one hand to work the buttons.

Yea.

Not only was I having internal issues, but that little pointy tip thing that is meant for your clit? Would not stay in place. So I was constantly aware of it’s placement as well. And constantly having to re-adjust here too. Maybe if the tip was thicker? Maybe a little flatter? I’m not sure really, but the pointed tip was not as pleasurable as I would have hoped.

Cleanup wasn’t as bad as I thought it might be. This vibe is made from a material called Jelly. The material rating of 2 should have been a good indication that I might not like this. Believe me, material rating is a very big deal to me now. Jelly happens to be one the least safe materials. It cannot be sanitized so no boiling. If you plan on sharing, you need to use a condom. The best way to clean vibrators or dildos made of jelly is warm water and a toy cleaner. Another thing about the jelly vibrator is that hair and dust can stick to it very easily. It’s annoying.

The Remote Body Wave comes with a pretty silver storage bag with a cinch tie, which I like. Any sex toy that comes in a nice box or bag for storage gets a thumbs up from me.

My biggest complaint about this vibrator? The buttons ON the vibe, not the remote, are extremely sensitive. Being that I keep my toys in my bedside drawer, every time I reached in and brushed against this vibe, it turned on. I’m assuming that I didn’t notice leaving it on because when I pulled it out to do this review, the battery was dead. The 9 volt battery that it takes. Lucky for me I bought the two pack. The remote takes 2 triple A batteries. I guess I’ve learned that when not in use, I need to take the 9 volt out of this sex toy.

Overall, there were many things about this vibe I didn’t like. I can honestly say that I probably would not recommend it at all. The remote feature is a fun novelty but I think that is the only thing going for this vibrator. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll still use it of course, but I wont recommend it, especially with a price tag a little over $60.



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